Coffee Talk

discuss amongst ya-selves...... 
  
just when you think courtney stodden
(the crazy slut girl who married the 51 year old at 16)
cant get any creepier..... 
that is not her husband.
THAT IS HER DAD.
as in - HER FATHER.
I don't even know where this edition of Coffee Talk is going to go from here, because this has repulsed me so much.  

Kesha... oh, sorry Ke$ha, 
has some show coming out on MTV.
where she drinks her own urine. 
she was "trying to be healthy."
see.... I warned you... this Coffee Talk is all kinds of messed up. 

The Bachelor:
now that Tierra is gone most of it is a big yawn, but:
we'll start with Ashley Ashlee
Oh, sorry again, it's AshLee
{what is wrong with people?}

you are really annoying with the child voice and slow dramatic emotional speeches and commentary.
if you close your eyes and listen to her talk, you would think you were listening to a 9 year old.  or a really high emotional basketcase.
lock it up. 
yelling "I love sean" in baby voice. 

new drinking game: everytime ash-LEE says THIS MAN.
crying. while saying "this man is just so amazing, i just love this man so much, this man blah de blah blah" 97 times in her confessional session.

then she starts CRYING talking to her parents about the Polar Bear Plunge.
it is not a giant metaphor for your life.... seriously.
it's just another time for producers to get girls to be in a bikini doing something idiotic with sean. 

in other news,
the Tierra terror is already engaged to someone else?
I guess the Bachelor didn't steal her "sparkle".
I know not all of you watch The Bachelor, but everyone needs to appreciate her sparkle comments. She was the hated girl in the house with no friends & she announced to the girls that "My parents said I have sparkle, and not to let any one take away my sparkle!!! " 
yes, girls don't like you because you sparkle! 
your mom is totally right! 

UMMMMM. 
I can't even. 
no words. 

RHOBH:
Adrienne needs to just be kicked off the Real Housewives.
She literally yells over everyone anytime she speaks, and all she says is "Noooooooo."
"No...... that's not nice."
"Now that's not true.  That's not true."
She seriously doesn't say anything except draw out vowels anytime she speaks.  And her horrid hair, clothing, and makeup aren't making up for what is coming out of her mouth.  
Except at the Nose Job Reveal Party.
(which is a totally normal party).
She couldn't stop bringing up how her husband would have done "as good a job... or better!" to everyone, including the doctor, on Kim's nose.
yeah.... I liked you better not talking. 
I guess we realized that she IS capable of paying her husband a compliment and acknowledging his presence.  I think it's the first second-hand nice complement she has ever said about him. {Don't worry... she didn't say it to his face.  She would never say anything nice to his face}.
P.S. Marisa, who also needs to GET OFF THE SHOW,
was wearing a BROWN SCRUNCHIE. 
I swear.  I rewound three times to check. 
oh, and the stuff about her husband she said last week at Lisa's tea party? He needs to divorce your 80's ass.  

LeAnn is suing her dentist
aka LeAnn continues her obnoxious attempts to be in the media at all times
now, I have no clue if he did botched crown work or not.  But saying he is responsible for you not having a career? Awww.... that's cute.  I wonder how many tweets you are going to send out about this, since tweeting, begging media outlets to pay attention to you, and begging your husband not to leave you seems to have been your "career" for the past 3 years. 
p.s. yeah..... when you put things over your teeth, your speech/voice may change.
Hello, didn't you hear Jewel say over and over for years that's why she avoided braces?? 
Come on LeAnn. PAY ATTENTION. 

sweet purse John Mayer
everyone needs a good cross-body. 

Oprah, good heavens.
I think you even made Beyonce want to vomit about herself.
even for you, this was ridiculous.
woof. 

Amanda Bynes continues to be cah-razy.
She stated, in a 25 Things you don't know about me to Us Weekly (how the hell she even managed to get that as press I don't even know)
"I moved to New York City and I love it. I've already lost 4 pounds! I weigh 121 - my goal weight is 100."
She is 5'8".  
100 pounds!?! 
someone get this girl some help already. fast.

RiRi got the sweetest Valentine's gift from her angelic boyfriend.
A bouquet of pot! 
He seriously is just every girls dream. 
side note:
I cannot stop playing Stay.
It is amazing. Damn you RiRi. 

xoxo
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